What do I want? Want is such a large word as, out of life, we can all tend to want too much. We end up focusing more on what we don’t have, than what we do have and nothing progresses through neglect. Life changes and moves so fast! So here I am, twenty-two years old, ready to make a stand.

What I truly want is to have no wants! I shall dream, as I shall focus, I shall work, as I shall capture… I shall not want, as I shall try, keeping my determination & talent intact. I will not want. I will have.

My name is Allie Shanks, welcome to my Literary Design Brief. If you got past my introduction without falling asleep then I guess that means we’re doing mighty fine, so far, so please let me continue by giving you a little more information about myself. This part should be good because, apparently, I just love to talk about me. Thank you for the very proud comments, "friends".

I was born & brought up in Falkirk, Scotland in a little scheme named 'Grange Avenue', where I lived with my parents, George & Beryl. I had an excellent childhood, great guidance, and I was a pretty decent kid… until I found that little mind of my own. I was forever drawing or writing short stories and I thought because I could draw & I could write that I didn’t need to go to school. I used to stamp my little feet with such determination that I’d do it my way. I knew what I wanted & nothing else bothered me or even half intrigued me in any way shape or form. Acutely, looking back, I must have been a nightmare.

" Why do I need maths to be an artist?" I used to scream at my Dad from my bedroom door, which was jammed closed at 8.49am when school started at 9.00am. I didn’t realise then that talents have to be worked on. Talent should be treated like a small child, it should be kept in sight and grow stronger as it walks through various open doors. Talent is like a muscle, it’ll always be there but, if worked on, it will stand that much stronger and nothing will ever break it. But I was young, I was stubborn and, basically, threw away my education. But I’m not sorry, because part of my uneducated background has made me slightly stronger, more independent and more realistic towards my future. I don’t have my writing on a pedestal… I have it well in sight and within my reach. But I do regret not taking the opportunities I had at school to learn, to search and to find. Each would have been an extra step for me towards my future success, another open door. I guess we all have regrets, as we all have a past. The funny thing is, even if I could turn back time to do it all again, I’m not sure I’d change a thing; the most obvious reason being that if things were different they just wouldn’t be the same.

At Fifteen years old I walked away from Graeme High School with nothing but 'skin of my teeth' Standard Grades, just enough to get me into Falkirk College where I planned to study Art & Design. That was when my mind opened & my artistic talent was noticed, whilst encouraged to grow.

I gained Higher Grade English, with an excellent grading for my drug related report, which I had researched fully & written up myself at sixteen years old. Only a few months previous, a snotty careers adviser sat before me telling me I’d get nowhere in life, especially nowhere that involved writing, as I’d told him on my facts sheet that I’d have loved to have been a journalist. Now, wait for it, how is this for encouragement? He suggested that I become a hairdresser! Not because of anything to do with talent or whatever, but because it was the only course at college, or job placement, I could get without needing brains… or qualifications, he added. Today, Mr. Read, I thank you, because when you said those words to me, you simply added fuel to my fire.

Whilst studying, I went through a few different part time jobs but, unfortunately, I have little concentration if it isn’t something I want 100%. In the years between 1998 and 2001 I was sacked from the following places: Three different Kebab shops, McDonalds, TK Max, Burger King, various factories… I even tried selling boxes of sweets, but it didn’t go to plan as, one night, my best mate and I decided to try a little smoke. We ended up eating the majority of the sweets that I had meant to sell - a whopping £32 pounds worth, actually! God knows how we could eat that amount, but we did. I was as shocked as I was broke after that one!

When I turned seventeen I decided it was time to get a little more serious. I kept college going, went on to do Graphic Design, and kept writing at nights when my time was my own, as I’d been doing since a young age. Then, when I passed my driving test, still age seventeen, I took a job as a Support Worker. I was on the bank staff and adored it. It made me realise that this world is made of so many different people, and that not one of those is unneeded; we all have a place, no matter how large or small.

Graduating in 2001 as a graphic designer, I sought, but never found, fulltime work, apart from small jobs here & there. I’d aimed for freelance, but the design industry appeared dry. Technology you see… Who needs qualifications in design when so many computers with different programmes can do it for you at the touch of a button?

2003 I joined a partnership, which covered a lot of things from design to professional investigations. It went well and it was at that point that I noticed myself writing more and more as the days went by. No one knew, not even my parents, about my writing and if not for the push of a close friend, I’d never have done any of what I have done now. Not that I didn’t believe in my writing, because I did, but I thought everything was about background and I had no educational stability.

Of course, I wanted to show off my work, hear reactions… but I lacked confidence in my knowledge, which scared me. My friend said, "Allie, your stuff ... is excellent, show everyone you have got it… don’t put it to waste". So, I hummed and hawed about it, then popped online. Before I knew it, I was contacting publishers and searching for similar souls. I came across Scottish Writers, where I have never been so understood as I am now. Thank you to Susan King, who has helped me a tremendous amount. 'Now You Know' it's about writers and writing, and it is about recognising and seizing opportunities … whether it is learning curves, projects or answers to questions. I have become part of a team that has helped enhance my knowledge.

Long may it continue "Till ma book's foo ‘n’ pens done!"

In December 04, I had signed a contract with 'Authorhouse' to publish my first poetry book, "Unspoken Not Forgotten", which was built up with poems past & recent. My first book was printed on the 13^th April 05. As far as that book goes, I’m proud of it, no matter how many copies sell or how many reviews it gets - good or bad. At the end of the day, they are my words, part of my heart and, no matter what progress is made, I could never discard it. To have no false hopes or expectations gives us a chance to enjoy and never be broken. I am proud of it because, if nothing else, I had enough strength & determination to 'go off on one' with no educational or professional backing, to see just how far I could get, knowing what I know and being no one… apart from me!

Real Radio's Colin Kelly gave me an interview, putting it on air and advertising my book. Falkirk Advertiser published a half page write up on my success & my story so far. I’d like to take this opportunity to thank everyone for their support as well as their encouragement. I will be eternally grateful.

I have started my writing career as I mean to go on, full of determination. I plan to give it my best whether it is short stories, poems or lyrics.

Over the next year my goal is to improve my writing skills and get my second book, "All In The Reaction" published. I have completed my first dream, but I have many - my biggest being to hear my words through a song, to write the lyrics and hear them sung by a solo artist or a band, known or unknown. It isn’t just a 'want', I know I’ll get it. You can call me cocky, big headed or full of it, or you can call me what I am - determined!

At this moment in time I am still writing and still holding down a part time bar job… Yes I have a book published, but nothing happens over night. It’s all about laying foundations before building, because to build on nothing things would do nothing but fall around me. I have what it takes, alongside my understanding that nothing happens over night. I’ll get to where I intend to be. Unfortunately, until then, it’s time for me to go and pull some pints.

I’ve always done things my way, (never wrong but perhaps a little creatively improper), and that is the only thing I can safely say. No matter what, I won't ever change. I have my style and through it being so honestly misunderstood, I do think a wide age group could relate to my work.

If you have a talent, build on it, because one day it will show how special you are, even if it's for no one’s benefit but your own.

Well! Time for work… I’m not famous enough just yet to be late and get away with it.

Thanks for reading and, if you ever have any questions, feel free to email me.

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