Eddie Elwood Rants...
Since when has it become so politically incorrect to mention the "class" thing?
One often hears it said that we live in a classless society. How frightfully incorrect! Therefore, to this, I say BOLLOCKS!
Recently, whilst listening to Radio Scotland, Senga emailed the show with regards to this very subject. (Agnes & Senga are forever emailing radio and TV shows in disagreement with comments!) But this particular radio show was discussing football versus rugby. Apparently, there is a problem encouraging new players into the sport of rugby and they wanted to understand WHY?
Duh! Let me think about this.... umm.... yes! That figures!
My reason is perfectly simple - WE DO NOT LIVE IN A CLASSLESS SOCIETY! The Government has simply moved the goal posts and turned 'class' into something that is now perceived as relating to one's financial status! But show me a rich working class bloke who can speak the Queen's english perfectly and knows his table manners!
You simply CANNOT buy class off the shelf. You either have it, or you haven't. Albeit, that Pretty Woman succeeded, but the success of that particular film reflects only the dream - not the reality! How many slappers, couch potatoes, Sengas (pardon the pun, my dear), or bingo wifeys sat there thinking 'if only...' yet saw no further than the money, the flash car, the clothes, the jewellery, the suave good looks of Dickie boy and what it would be like to have 'the lot'? I'll bet my bottom dollar that not one of them thought of the English lessons, etiquette lessons, the strict diet and exercise regimes, or the excrutiatingly painful hours spent with an elocutionist!
If you disagree with my comments, then show me a lower class no-good who invested in class with his or her lottery millions. Most of them bought their council houses, for God's sake! It's like paying them off with a huge redundancy cheque! Into what do they invest? A council house, a Vauxhall and maybe shares in a racehorse. Or perhaps they bought a parrot when they returned from Spain. Show me the millionaire who made good from their redundancy cheque! They are the exception, not the rule. Most end up back where they started - ground level in our so-called classless society.
Anyway, as Senga pointed out (much to the consternation of the Radio Scotland studio presenters), Rugby, is considered a sport for the middle classes, rural communities outside of council estates and young pre-qualified professionals. It's pretty much the opposite of football, where any Tom, Dick or Harry can practice and if they make it, they end up making fools of themselves on TV by possessing the inability to string together a few words in English.
Rugby is mainly played during private, university or pre-university education or by those individuals, mainly boys, who find themselves with parents within the income bracket that allows participation in such activities. There is NO getting away from it. Anyone whom I have ever known to have played the game has simply enjoyed it for what it is - a game! And then they completed their studies and became vets, doctors, lawyers or highflying businessmen. There were a few others, granted. But when they came home from rugby practice they showered then went straight to bed, in preparation for rising at dawn to milk the cows, go to market or tend their stock and land.
If anyone disagrees with my theory, please do not hesitate to let me know how many rugby pitches are located within your local council estate and how many council estate youngsters play rugby, as opposed to kicking a ball around in a game of footie on any available piece of land. You could also let me know how many professional footballers have graduated from Uni with Honours degrees.
Now I have lost my concentration and don't even know how this skit began. What were we discussing?